STOPP Principles...

So, my weekly blog is continuing as before. In that it's becoming a monthly/six weekly thing. But I'll carry on regardless.

Today is something fairly light, fairly easy to write and for you to read. Something simple to help me get into blogging again.

After my previous posts about depression and suicide, a few friends contacted me privately to share their thoughts, and to ask for advice, and to talk to someone who understands. I would never break that trust and go into any detail, but you know who you are and contacting me is very welcome. It helps both of us.

That's what this post is about, basically to help a couple of people who've been unsure what to do when things like anxiety strike. The 'STOPP' principle is something my counsellor explained to me a long while ago, and something that I've continued to use to this day. You might have a bad memory, a bad experience, a bad thought or a 'trigger' (more on those another time), and stopp is essentially a self help aid to deal with those things and a form of CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy).

So, say you're having an anxiety attack caused by panicking over something going wrong in your day:

• S - stop what you're doing and take a moment for reflection. Pause everything and take yourself somewhere quiet. Outside, another room etc.

• T - take a breath. Slow right down, try to calm yourself down and breath methodically.

• O - observe. Think about what you're thinking/feeling. Think about what is causing it, and how you're reacting to it. What are the exact thoughts you're having right now.

• P - perspective. What's the bigger picture, what is actually making you feel like this? Is there one core issue you can resolve? How would you calm a friend down in this situation? Tell yourself what you'd tell them. Are you being reasonable and logical or are you letting your emotions control you?  Remind yourself - this feeling will pass. Step back emotionally and think logically.

• P - practice. Meaning practice what works for you and remember to use it next time. Practice the steps above even for small irrelevant hiccups during the day and remember you do not always need to react to your anxiety/trigger/fear impulsively and emotionally.

With practice it will become much easier when a severe anxiety attack happens or when you are faced with a volatile event, or a destructive memory. Although it doesn't work every single time and you still need to manage certain things I've found after a few years of doing this for smaller more mundane things I've become an "ah well it could be worse" or "the past is the past" or "whatever happens, happens" kind of person, as opposed to the anxious wreck I have been before. 

The bigger the problem the bigger the challenge but remember to try to apply logic and reason and hopefully STOPP will become natural over time.